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APRIL FOOLS!!

Made you look!  These stories are just for tease.  (I know, some of our titles on a daily basis give you that double take effect.)
 (Each April 1 is "April Fools' Day" in U.S.)

by Sterling D. Allan
Pure Energy Systems News

Here's a collection of energy-related news stories I've compiled and prepared especially for our April 1, 2009 coverage.

1 HP Vietnamese Hybrid Runs on Hay

A couple of rural Vietnamese inventors have turned the world of physics on its head by achieving a COP (Cow-efficient of Performance) far in excess of what was possible even a century ago.  They are hopeful that within a couple of years of engineering they may have something that could be of use for all-terrain vehicle applications, where the emissions would blend in more seamlessly, and where the fuel is available on-demand, from the environment.

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Scientists Discover New Method for Controlling Tidal Energy

A research team in Switzerland have been working on a method whereby they can speed up or slow down the motion of the moon, by hooking it up to a crane.  

A drawback of the system is tidal slosh when local ground vibrations cause the crane to jiggle.  "An earthquake there at their facility could mean a global tidal wave," argues a local activist who has been petitioning against the instillation.

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Taiwanese Military Developing Anti-Gravity Tech for Troops

The Chinese military has been perfecting a new method of troop transport via anti-gravity vests.

While flapping the arms is not necessary, some troops can't help but extend their arms in a flying motion like birds. 

The vests were developed by inventor Jeum Ping Jaques, of Chinese and French ancestry, who finally decided to let the technology be used by China, having been kicked in the seat of his pants one too many times by his French father.  While those episodes were part of his inspiration for launching the technology, he said, "the memory is just too painful."

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On-Demand Pig Manure-Powered Bike Developed

A Taiwanese inventor has come up with a way to propel his motorbike with the pig manure generated en route from transporting his pigs.

"I'm always hauling these things around, and one day it occurred to me that I might as well put that wasted pig emissions stuff to use," he said.

"The most difficult things as wrapping the pigs in their blankets," he added.

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NatGeo Bus Powered by Passengers

The bussing authority in Atlanta in conjunction with NatGeo, a global biofuel research group, has been experimenting with a new approach to powering their bus fleet with the passengers that board the bus.  Passengers enter through the jaws and exit through the tail pipe.

A downside of the initiative has been replenishing the feedstock.  "We did not take into account that our regular passengers would not be coming back," said Shar Key, CEO of of NatGeo.  For now, they are resolving this by circulating the bus among different locations throughout the city so that they always have a fresh batch of passengers.

"This is definitely reducing the global footprint of the human species," Key said.  "We want to make the world more inhabitable for the rising generation," she said, with her son, Muhn standing by her side.

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See also

• April Fools 2008
• April Fools 2007
• April Fools 2006
• Humor

Page posted by Sterling D. Allan, April 1, 2008
Last updated July 25, 2009